Saturday, June 10, 2017

What Does Bob Thiel and Timothy Kitchen Have In Common?



It is always fascinating reading the shear nonsense that various cult leaders and members post on their Facebook pages and websites.  The COG has always had an inner cabal of members who thought they had the inside track to secret knowledge.  That secret knowledge led to some crazy people over the decades saying and doing a lot of weird things. These weirdos also attracted equally weird followers, just as they still do today.

We have Bob Thiel, who after a couple of nightmares brought on by some bad Mexican food, declared that God spoke to him in those nightmares.  God apparently had run out of men to run yet another COG so he had to resort to Bob Thiel to be his end time man. After stabbing his "daddy" Rod Meredith in the back, Thiel declared he was a prophet and Chief Overseer of the best Church of God in this end times.

Then there is the Kitchen clan who have elevated Herbert Armstrong and his writings right up there beside Jesus and the Bible.  No man in human history has ever been used more mightily than Herb Armstrong.  No book in the history of civilization has ever been written that is as powerful as The Mystery of the Ages.  It sits right next to the Bible in its importance.  No human writings are worth preserving more than Herb's.

So what do these guys all have in common?  They both believe that The Nevada County Scooper is a legitimate source of news and truth.  Almost-arrested Bob Thiel got all giddy with excitement last week when he reported how the Bilderberg's were meetings in Sierra City, CA so that they could visit the grave of Adolph Hitler, who was reported to be buried nearby.   Days went by as he was mocked by scores of people for falling for such stupidity.

Now we can add Timothy Kitchen Jr. to the Nevada Scooper fan club! Tim Kitchen Jr. is reporting that President Trump has finally put an end to the jets flying over the country and leaving those evil chemtrails.

Kitchen writes that Trump is ending the chemtrail spraying and that they will now turn off all the"smart meters so we can bake from the sun."   Kitchen even invokes the Bible to support this belief.


Both of these numbnuts apparently do not have the common sense to understand that the Nevada County Scooper is a satire site.  Satire, boys...satire.


10 comments:

Byker Bob said...

Back when Rowan and Martin's "Laugh In" emerged, church members believed it was part of a communist plot. The Armstrongite mind has never been able to grasp the concept of satire, or to appreciate it, Basil Wolverton not withstanding. And, of course, that leads to failure to understand obvious literary devices contained in the Bible.

Not surprising. The lights appear to be on, but nobody is home.

BB

I Knew Bob In LCG said...

This is so hilarious. What a couple of idiots.

Anonymous said...

The Plain Truth that caught my attention in my uncle's home back in 1952 had the blaring headline "Hitler Did Not Die!." Thus, began my twenty plus years of stupidity. That theory was first put forth in sensationalist publications like the Police Gazette. A lot of what people swallow traces back to such disreputable sources.

Allen C. Dexter

Redfox712 said...

How disgraceful that these Armstrongites who insist that they are among the only "true Christians" in all the world should be so removed from reality that they cannot discern satire.

Jeremiah Johnson - Toronto, Ontario said...

Those weird & wacky Armstrong ass kissers.

The Painful Truth said...

Personally I am glad these idiots put this on-line. When a normal person reads this they turn off. If these morons did this as when I was interested in the church, I would have walked. Stupid is as stupid does. Thiel or Kitchen, which one would you say is comparable to Forest Gump?

Connie Schmidt said...

ITS TRUE! ...HITLER INDEED IS ALIVE AND WELL! ...

He was genetically engineered and transmogrified into DAVE PACK!

WLM537 said...

Not only is Hitler still alive, so is Hebert Armstrong and Garner Ted Armstrong living in the Canadian Rockies. LOL

Anonymous said...

You're wrong, Connie. He lives on in Donald Trump.

Allen C. Dexter

Anonymous said...

I'm a unapologetic supporter of LCG but I just have to say, in the words of Larry the Cable Guy - "I don't care who you are, that right there is funny."